How to cure writers block

In a pursuit to cure writers block, I am going to blog. You might think, but its a blog, how will you write? But A HAH good sir, (45 second lapse in typing) perhaps it is an audio blog, or a musical blog, or better yet, a gateway to my mind, spewed forth onto the annals of the internets.

Crazy, yes. (another lapse in typing). However, I believe that this writers block is not of written nature, and is more of a thinking block. The words of academia elude me, I cannot start another essay due party to brain fatigue from reading books and primary sources, but also due to a general dissatisfication (that is not a word, but it is now) with the idea of writing two essays on my birthday. Clearly, tomorrow is my birthday, and in all likelihood, I will be writing essays tomorrow because I definitely did not get to it yet today.

There is nothing better than coming up with words because your brain is misfiring and can't think of the word(s) you actually wanted to use. There is also nothing better than annoying people with using non-words like 'unthaw' and 'irregardless' and 'inflamable'. I like annoying people. Sometimes I even intentionally use bad grammar to annoying people. 

Oh, and the other thing that I really like is how I know people who are reading this are probably hearing me in their head. I kinda like being inside your head right now. You had no idea I was so creepy did you? Is it more creepy that I just said that, or that you just heard me say that in your head...am I still in your head? Now you'll just have to keep reading to see what it is I'm going to say next. 

Turns out this is not a cure for writers block, but a stream of consciousness exercise that is running through both your head and mine as you read the words on the screen. (Lapse in typing, check out some links, reads grants blog about foursome gone wrong)

Writers block is the worst. Clearly, my fingers are functioning, and coming up with thoughts and words, but to make those thought at all relevant to the A I would like to get, that is the problem. 

What have I attempted to cure it with so far? Well, I practiced music and blew on a wooden recorder for an hour. Then I made some apple crisp. Then I played some rock band. Well obviously I'm trying this with the idea that any writing is better than no writing, although by this point you're probably thinking....'Really, not so much, this is pretty lame' I bet I made you laugh though. 

(Lapse, thinking, what else have I done today?) Oh, well I checked out facebook. That's pretty standard. I read the news. Didn't inspire me much, though the idea of finding Atlantis made me want to go on vacation...mmm vacation.

I recently decided that since I lack the funds to go places I want to go, all the liquor I buy will be indicative of the places I wish to be. Last night, I travelled to France and England. France was an organic experience, and Specifically I travelled to Newcastle England, which I later learned was not Newcastle, but some other place. . . This proved very entertaining for me as my roommate who does not follow the same plan ended up with beer that tasted like his wife, dirt and honey. Apparently it tasted non-existent? 

I hope I don't start to suffer from bloggers block, if there is indeed such a thing. That would be painful and clearly not conducive to my academic career which relies on blogging to cure writers block. I wonder if its working yet (ponders, then decides blog is done, makes mental note on beginning of essay, sighs, then grins "success")